25 November 2014

Wargames Fashion Police A.K.A. you need to get a life buddy! ( RANT WARNING )

Right I know this is going to cause a bit of a do but I have had it with this type of wandering goon.

Last night I completed a couple of fellas I had been working on for some good friends in the Blogging community. I took some snaps and sent them direct to the manufacturer and he was over the moon with the images so much so that he immediately asked if they could be used. I had no objections in fact quite the opposite (See I am learning to accept praise and credit). However it went completely 'Pete Tong' for me about half an hour later when one of these fashion police types came on and said "The skins didn't wear a belgic Shako at Waterloo" well strike me down with a feather another idiot on a social network is there no feckin escape.

The first thoughts into my mind were un-printable as I don't paint from my imagination unless I am doing a fantasy piece and then anything goes. I have spent most of my life researching the whole Napoleonic period and have a reference library to back that up along with images and god knows what stored on various electronic storage devices. But with a mind like mine doubt creeps in and so off I went to double check my sources just in case I made a mistake.

Guess what? I had not made an error and had located enough information and uniform plates etc to back this up. I was buggered if I was not going to defend my self though, as another new gamer was painting the same unit in Belgic Shako and became concerned he had the wrong uniform as well. (You see how these numpty's cause issues). I gave the information to prove my point, and to his credit numpty apologised stating  "I always get these two units mixed up". I wanted to reply " Its feckin twats like you that open your gobs without checking stuff that are the worlds biggest pain in the arse" or words to that effect, but I don't do the whole flame war, Internet troll thing and besides I was right.

Now this is not just a one off event it regularly features at shows, and myself and Kev often discuss these types of people in fact I am sure I have a complete twat radar built in. More often than not they are less than hygienic and can be smelt from a good hundred paces far less if the wind is in the wrong direction. This is the full on frontal assault, and is designed to catch you off guard, as you baulk from the fumes. They then open with a verbal barrage as they cogitate and tell you exactly what mistake you have made and they have found a rare manuscript written in some unread ancient text that proves their point. Telling you that to get the correct shade of scarlet for your British line you needed the juice of three extinct lava beetles, the anus of newt and to mix that with 5% pixie dust and you would have got it bamg on right! That is not the only tactic these so called experts have though. They have a far more sneaky tactic and that is the KAMKAZE RUCKSACK. Approaching like Kung FU Panda they blunder about knocking items off displays, smacking people in the face and walking in a care free attitude reminding you, that the rucksack and lack of bath are a fatal combination and should be avoided. That is their sole intention it is their space maker and they want you to get out of the way. So they make a beeline to the display and rip holes in the smallest of incorrect details in an effort to make them feel more important and deride your efforts.

I remember one incident very well several years ago after having painted lots of Dutch and Belgian troops for a display game, and this rather offensive character walked up to the display and started picking my figures up and sticking them as close to his nasal cavity as possible, to inspect them before randomly re assigning them to the table. He did this several times having broken two figures in the process. Finally I did the unthinkable I asked if he was alright " Yeah just checking the paint job" came the reply. I remained polite but was part of a team demonstrating so had to then he quipped " Your Orange is a bit bright" I lost it at that point and almost retorted "well if you continue to pick my figures up by the bayonets and slap em down like that you're going to need some dental work." Thank fully my buddies pulled me away and said idiot was dispatched in short order. The point here is they are toys and they get played with, we paint them to what we have available regardless of it being the exact shade etc. Why Oh Why do these people not just get a life and find another hobby!!!

So to every member of the anally retentive collective A.K.A the " Wargames Fashion Police" I Salute You



These wonderful miniatures are from the Westfalia miniatures range and are labelled as a couple of Brits holidaying in Belgium. I choose to paint these as soldiers of the 27th Inniskilling regiment, and the strawberry blond is just right.

Loki

77 comments:

  1. As I said on my blog's facebook page the other day "It amazes me how bent out of shape some people will get over the "right way" to paint and play with toy soldiers."

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    1. it takes all sorts to make the world go round but these types are at the butt end of socially inept

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  2. They should really just relax.

    Although people like that are probably the reason I never paint anything post-1650!

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    1. thats my point though Evan it could destroy a youngster and put them off gaming because of a-holes like this

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  3. Thought you said you were calming yourself down????
    Strawberry Blonde eh?
    Wonder who that could be???

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    1. Well said Andrew, you just described Ray too!

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    2. I had to laugh at this as I can actually see Ray like this in certain areas!

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  4. No argument here mate. Can't disagree with anything in the post, but those canteens are the wrong colour . . . .

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  5. Believe it or not I get that from people about my Very British Civil War stuff, I politely remind then it never happened and I am the source of the illustrations so what I say goes, still it doesnt stop them. The stupid thing is if they look good and look correct then thats it. We all paint things in a different way and most use third hand references as research at best.

    Still Andrew I have to say that the skin tone for the Irish isnt pale enough, the scarlet is way to bright and the trousers havnt got seven shades of shite on them. You need to repaint them again. :P

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    1. Oh I have no problem believing it at all my friend, there are a complete sect oof arseholes that travel to shows specifically intent on pissing people off because they have no life!

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  6. I think they have the wrong number of buttons on the left cudd.. On June 18th 1815' they had 3 on the left and 4 on the right... I read it I book it must be right...

    Life my friend is too fekin short ... Do they look good yes... Simples... Was your punter happy ... Yes.. The rest is irrelevant ..

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    1. Very true Dave, its the ones that open their mouths without the knowledge that irk me the most

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  7. I thank my stars I've never had a run in with a button-counter! I usually point out inaccuracies or anachronisms in my work to short-circuit potential criticism, but so far everyone online and in person has been nothing but supportive.

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    1. The thing is my friend sometimes we have to make a reasonable deduction from all the sources we have, and our conclusion of what it looks like is based on years of study and painting, it may not be perfect but in the absence of actual evidence it cant be disproved as incorrect. I have to agree the blogging community is a shining example of the best of humanity.

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  8. Well said that man/tricksy god!

    I think that's why I seem to go for irregular armies - no uniforms for some a**ehole to tell you that you've got wrong.

    Paint them how you want and to hell with the w*nkers :)

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    1. Well I didn't like to mentioin it, but those Mongol light foot . . . . .

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    2. Thanks Tamsin, and you are damned right my girl, but even if you did not paint irregular armies at the end of the day they are your toys and what right do they have to tell you how to paint em, I say bring back public execution :)

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  9. Loki
    Good rant! Luckily my stuff isn't painted well enough to warrant that sort of attention! At least he had the good sense to admit the mistake - which mostly opening his big yap without getting his facts straight.
    Anyway I love both sets of Inniskillings.
    Cheers
    PD

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  10. Our little hobby does collect more than it's fair share of those who are, shall we say, "socially unskilled". Rivet counters can be very annoying and can piss one off but letting them get under your skin per the above kind of lets 'em win a little bit. I've found in life that any idiot can point out a problem (real or imagined) but only a handful try to create something - be glad you're a creator not a silly critic.

    Nice paint job, although I think you'll find that the grass tufts depicted on the bases are more North American than European....

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    1. Well said Miles, african tundra grass that is

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  11. Another excellent rant! Well said :-)

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  12. I've said it before, and I'll say it again. People suck.

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    1. I agree some of them really do, but thank fully their are a lot of good people too

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  13. LOL I enjoyed that, yes I have come across of those types before...

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  14. I do love a good rant! And you do it well!

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  15. There's is only one um.
    And that's F*ck um.
    Great post. Cheers

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  16. I forgot to say just how good they are, lovely paintjob Loki

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  17. LoL ... what a brilliant way to end your rant/post. Nice ^_^ But I think the shade of blue on their trousers needs a tear from a virgin supermodel who is also currently dating an overpaid footballer. ;)

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  18. If you give up painting I'm pretty sure you have a career in comedy!! That was too funny.

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    1. glad you liked it, I do have my moments

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  19. Well all.
    for customers I try to be as accurate as I can.
    but for myself it is a completely different matter.
    brits in red , frogs in blue.
    I dont give a damn.
    my figures my rules and sod em.
    after my escapade with the wfp regarding a phalangite helmet and me asking the chap politely if he was f*#king there.
    I decided it's not worth the bother.
    well said mate.

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  20. Great rant mate. Your figures are fantastic, and I assume that anyone criticising them is basically envious. I am a bit ever time I see something you've done! Those plonkers are like eunuchs - they know how it should be done but there's no chance they can do it themselves.

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    1. Thank you Dux for the kind words, there is no need to be envious of my work fella you have a good talent for painting yourself

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  21. Great rant Loki! I too have met a few like that and absolutely no time for them at all!

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  22. We should all listen to the fashion police with awe and a deep reverence...after all they were present at the actual battle.

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  23. Your hobby, your choice - at least that's how I feel.

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    1. It certainly is Michael,it just irks when I spend hours getting things right before I begin for some brain dead moron to tell me its wrong. It is like a red rag to a bull

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  24. I remember some prick on TMP told one guy his plumes were the wrong colour for his Romans. It pissed me off and I had nothing to do with it. Quite a few folks including myself pointed out it's his toys and hobby to do as he pleases. Of course the prick in question said if he posts them on forums then he should accept criticism as he is exposing himself to it. I think as do many unless somebody asks for a critique you should only say something positive or nothing at all. Nothing worse then old grognard fu**ing know it all a**holes to turn new comers off the hobby. I felt like reaching through the screen and throttling the f**k and screaming shut the f**k up it's his hobby!

    Oh btw your red is to bright according to historian prof.......

    Christopher

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    1. One more example of why I am not much of a TMP fan!

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    2. I havent used the Too Many Prick forum for at least 10 years because of this, they dont see that you would post a picture to show your work, not for them to have open season on doing you down because they think differently

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  25. Well said, mate. Is it just me, or does the Napoleonic period bring out the twats in large numbers? I love painting wee Frenchmen, i try to get it right, but at the end of the day, I give it my best and don't give a toss if I got it wrong.

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    1. oh its not you my friend the twats are everywhere and all shapes and sizes, just beware the rucksack

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  26. Great post, the WFP always put me off painting Napoleonics, but I thought sod em, I'll paint them the way I want, french in blue and Brits in red. I'm happy with them

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    1. Napoleonics is a great period, sadly it also attracts the largest number of self proclaimed uniform experts

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  27. Great rant! I'm always wondering where these morons come from. Especially the f**kers like you mentioned at that show. Why is it so darn hard to realize that even miniatures at a show are somebody's property and should be handled with care and not touched without some sort of permission.

    But if debating the correct headgear and paint shades for historicals sounds daft I recommend checking some of the sci-fi and fantasy related forums. I always find it comical how people can fight over the correct skin shade for Orcs or the right purple tint for some obscure Space Marine chapter that is mentioned once in all GW literature combined. It's fantasy for pete's sake :D

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    1. I had a massive set too with some goon that told me I could not do night goblins with dark pink skin as they had to be green, he got even angrier when I asked him to prove they were not pink. telling me Games workshop says they are green. I told him that goblins have appeared in norse mythology for thousands of years and yet strangely they are not mentioned as being green he slunk away! these people do nothing to encourage anyone into a creative hobby

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  28. Nice read.

    But why does this seems to happen more often with Napoleonic miniatures ?
    Must be all the buttons on the uniforms I guess.

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    1. thanks, I believe its just the numbers theory more of them

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  29. Superb :)
    A pain we all share...and if anyone reads that and doesn't then the likelihood is they are the cause of it...

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  30. Hey! Are those the two blokes I sent you as part of your Challenge prizes from last year? They look brill Loki!

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    1. Thank you Curt, they are indeed the prize for the rather Cheeky Spider entry! Kawe loved em and posted the to Westfalia so that was plenty good enough for me

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  31. I don't pay attention to the armchair button counters anymore.

    I have served in the Army. If they want realism they should try a sucking chest wound or treading on a I.E.D.

    When you are in the field you sometimes have to improvise. There is often a mix of kit depending on what you were issued and what is/was available at the time.

    Keep up the great blog and the excellent brushwork!

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  32. A difficult task... I don't want to foul my own nest but actually I presume such nitpicking is widespread among German wargamers... Unfortunaltely there are smart-arses everywhere who just can't do better then searching mistake in each and every figure they see.
    Don't care about them !

    Honestly I always appriciate honest feedback. Pointing out mistakes is part of that but there's a certain edge of politeness. When I myself sense that I have to point out a mistake, then I try to point out the things I like first. Crickey, our hobby's meant to be fun! So everyone who presents his miniatures has the right to get some encouragement and not only a punch in the gut.

    In German we say: Der Ton macht die Musik.
    In English it's like: It's not what you say, but how you say it.

    Just my two humble pence about that.

    Cheers
    Stefan

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    1. It is a worldwide problem Stefan. I agree if you have to point out a glaring mistake then it should be done politely so as not to anger the painter who has laboured over his work.

      Das Leben ist zu kurz, um über die Schaltfläche Zähler Sorgen
      regards
      Loki

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  33. Enjoy your blog. When I encounter individuals such as you did, I think about this article from warlord games: http://www.warlordgames.com/one-mans-ox-goad-is-another-mans-ink-pen/

    While the article is about painting romans, I think it could apply to any era or theme. Paint as you please, as long as it is pleasing to you.

    Bret

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  34. If they don't like it paint their own Bl@@dy figures.

    As long as my Crimean Russians 'look like' Crimean Russians I don't care whether the facings are correct or the trousers are the right colour.

    This is also why I only game with friends and we have a lot of fun doing so

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  35. Yeah there are a lot of Tossers about.
    How needs them.
    Oxygen thieves if you ask me!

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  36. One reason why I try to stick to fantasy and Imagi-nations. I also just wanted to say that I greatly admire your painting and try to learn from what you post. I'm hoping to utilize your triads for this years challenge.

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  37. Great post. I try for accuracy in my painting, but given that sources conflict or don't exist, plus rigors of campaign and resupply, dyes etc, at the end of the day I am happy if they look the part. And I must say those two rude lads look fantastic and speak volumes.

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